All right, it's war dangit.
I hereby call upon the north side to take up arms and storm the south side with violent fury.
Carlos Zambrano whacked on pitching arm with bat by White Sox coach.
What? We don't have enough problems?
Or as one of the Cub Reporters put it: "Next up on the Cubs injury front, Aramis Ramirez gets nailed by an anvil after rounding second base."