Father Sibley points us to this post on LAMLand about liturgical bloopers.
Oh boy oh boy oh boy. This is one of my favorite topics. Here's two of my favorites:
1) The wireless mic. One priest I was a Sacristan for (who shal remain nameless except that his name translated means "Fat Bald" told a story about a previous parish. He was saying Mass, and absolutely had to go to the bathroom. So during the readings he slipped out to the bathroom that was just past the Sacristy and proceeded to use it - WITH HIS MIC ON - while singing:
You must remember this
A piss is still a piss.
He returned to a white-faced congregation staring at him eyes wide and mouths agape.
2) Flaming altar-boy I heard this one straight from the pastor's mouth when I worked at the Catholic bookstore. During the Gospel reading at a Confirmation Mass (Bishop and everything), one of the altar boys was standing a wee bit too close to a torch and his surplice caught. Well, nobody around him noticed until somebody from the congregation pointed and yelled, "FIRE!" At which point the Bishop's Master of Ceremonies, turned around and pounded on the boy's arm and back to put the fire out. The MC turned around to find the Bishop giving him a "What is going on look," to which he responded with a reassuring nod of the head, "Just a small fire."
